Destiny Swapping & Energy Swapping: Reclaiming What Was Always Yours
There’s a quiet, often invisible trauma that many of us carry — one that doesn’t come with scars but with a deep sense of disorientation. A feeling that somehow, somewhere along the line, we stepped out of our own lives and into someone else’s.
Destiny Swapping
You didn’t mean to. You didn’t consciously agree to it. But somehow, you began living someone else’s story.
Maybe it was a parent who never fulfilled their dream, and you tried to carry it for them.
Maybe it was a partner who needed you to shrink so they could shine.
Maybe it was society, whispering roles into your ear until you forgot your own voice.
And somewhere in the middle of all that molding and merging, your original path — your soul’s true trajectory — was left behind. That’s destiny swapping: when your life begins to reflect someone else’s desire, someone else’s wound, someone else’s expectations more than your own truth.
The result? A quiet ache. A low-grade depression. A loss of purpose or identity.
It’s not your fault. You were taught to over-accommodate, to be good, to survive.
But now it’s time to come back.
To reclaim the map.
To re-write the story.
To return to the you that always was.
Energy Swapping
The body remembers what the mind forgets. And energy doesn’t lie.
When you've been in a relationship where emotional abuse, gaslighting, or even subtle manipulation was present, you often come away feeling like you’re carrying something that isn’t yours.
That’s because you are.
When someone refuses to take accountability, they often dump their emotions on you — their shame, their rage, their helplessness. You walk away feeling heavy, foggy, anxious. That’s energy swapping. The silent transfer of weight, where their darkness is exchanged for your light.
You feel like you’ve been hijacked.
And in many ways, you have — energetically.
Healing requires not just mental clarity but energetic sovereignty.
You have the right to return what doesn’t belong to you.
To release what was never yours to hold.
To take your energy back.
To take your life back.
Signs You’ve Swapped Destiny or Energy
You feel like a stranger in your own life.
You experience chronic fatigue or a persistent fog.
You’re living a life that checks all the boxes — but feels hollow.
You feel stuck in guilt, shame, or sadness that doesn’t feel like yours.
You’ve lost the sense of who you were before the relationship or event.
Practices for Reclaiming
Cord Cutting: Visualize energetic ties being cut between you and the person who swapped destinies or energy with you.
Journaling: Ask: Whose life am I living? What would my life look like if I were fully me?
Energetic Return Ritual: Say aloud: I return what is not mine. I reclaim what has always been mine.
Embodiment Work: Ground yourself in your body. Dance, walk barefoot, breathe deeply. Reclaim your space.
When Love Becomes Theft: Destiny & Energy Swapping with a Covert Narcissist
At first, it felt like connection.
Deep, intense, unspoken.
You thought you had found your person.
But slowly — almost invisibly — your energy, your identity, and your destiny began to slip through your fingers.
This is what it’s like to love a covert narcissist.
✦ What Is Covert Narcissism?
Covert narcissism wears a mask of vulnerability, victimhood, or humility. They don’t brag or boast — instead, they manipulate through guilt, silence, subtle gaslighting, and passive control. Their tactics are quiet but deadly.
You won’t see it coming.
But you’ll feel it — in your gut, your bones, your nervous system.
✦ Destiny Swapping: Living Their Life Instead of Yours
Covert narcissists don’t just control situations — they hijack identities.
They often cannot stand to see someone else shining, growing, or stepping into their full potential. So they’ll slowly redirect your energy, your dreams, your very purpose to serve their narrative.
You start giving up your passions to avoid their passive disapproval.
You walk on eggshells, adjusting your choices to avoid triggering them.
Your dreams shrink so theirs can stay intact.
You find yourself forgetting what you even wanted in the first place.
It’s not just co-dependence — it’s destiny theft.
And what’s worse? You often volunteer for it, believing it’s love.
✦ Energy Swapping: Carrying Their Shame So They Don’t Have To
Covert narcissists are masterful at emotional displacement.
They don’t feel shame — you do.
They don’t carry blame — you apologize.
They don’t show rage — you internalize their coldness and confusion as your fault.
This is energy swapping at its most dangerous. You become the container for emotions they refuse to own. And they slowly siphon your vitality in the process.
You start feeling:
Exhausted, even after rest
Anxious without reason
Emotionally foggy or numb
Deeply confused about what’s true and what’s not
They walk away fine.
You walk away broken — but can’t explain why.
✦ The Awakening: Reclaiming Your Energy, Reclaiming Your Destiny
Waking up from this kind of abuse is like coming out of a trance.
You may not recognize yourself.
You may feel raw, angry, grief-stricken.
But you are not crazy — you were energetically hijacked.
And now, you get to take it all back.
You get to:
Return their shame, guilt, and projections.
Reclaim your voice, your dreams, your direction.
Rewrite your story — with you at the center.
You didn’t lose yourself.
You were sacrificing yourself, moment by moment, for the illusion of love.
But you survived. And now, you remember.
✦ Simple Healing Ritual
Energetic Return Invocation:
“I now return what is not mine.
I release the burdens, beliefs, and energies I carried for you.
I reclaim what was always mine — my voice, my light, my life.
It is safe now to be fully me.”
✦ Final Words
A covert narcissist doesn’t just break your heart — they rewrite your life, until you don’t know what’s yours anymore.
But you can rewrite it back.
You can swap back your destiny.
You can gather up every piece of energy that was taken from you.
And when you do —
You don’t just heal.
You rise.
Closing Reminder
You are allowed to outgrow the life someone else imagined for you.
You are allowed to reject the weight someone else placed upon you.
You are allowed to return to yourself.
And when you do — your own destiny, your own energy, your own light — will greet you like a long-lost friend. Carlin